Early in my career, I didn't go to any women in tech events. Two main reasons: (1) I spent a lot of effort subconsciously trying to fit into the tech boys club, and avoided anything that highlighted that I was in fact not a boy, and (2) honestly I just want to be an engineer.
That strategy was sort of working for me, and I thought I was doing fine without spending extra energy on women in tech stuff.
That was until I worked with truly toxic people who made me realize that I was never going to be welcomed in the boys club. By then, I had made "fitting in" part of my identity, and I literally didn't know how to exist as myself in tech.